Your pool is balanced, but you are not!

The other day I was having problems with my pool because it was cloudy. It seemed to be reflecting its owner. I went with my water sample (this is like a drug test for your pool) and gave to the lady behind the counter. After testing it, she said in a loud voice, “Paul your pool is perfectly in balance but you need to clean your filter.” I responded with “if life were just that easy.”

There are four things that can be learned from the 12 step programs that are important for all of us in balancing our life.

Take one day at a time. When you are in a crises just go through that day, one day at a time don’t project the future. Just deal with what is in front of you.
Accept the things that you can not change. Move on don’t whine about what happened and how unfair life is.
Change the things you can. Do what you can to get back on your feet and do what you can to make sure this does not happen again.
Make sure you know the difference. Ask others opinions and find out what they think.

If I practiced this every day I would be like my pool after I cleaned the filter, balanced and clear.

What things do you do to help balance you life with work and home and disappointments?

thought I'd share some of my thoughts on how I find balance in my life. I share this with my family as well as the customers with whom we work. We all have choices in our lives. We can choose to be a victim of the circumstance that we may be in, or we can choose to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, learn powerful lessons from that situation so we can
eliminate any chance of a replay... and move on. I personally believe that everything in our lives happens for a reason, that there is a lesson in it for us. Look for the lessons in the situation, don't look for reasons to feel sorry for yourself. If we keep this thought in mind, we can keep our lives in balance. A very powerful saying went something like this..."Watch your thoughts, for your thoughts become your words; Watch your words, for your words become your actions; Watch your actions for your actions become
your character; Watch your character, for your character becomes your destiny." That is where you'll end up in life...and it all begins with your thoughts. Aloha, Paul, and thanks for the great wisdom that you continue to share with us! Shelley, Honolulu , HI

Thanks for the reminder! Lately, with so many new people in our organization, the demands are high, the tone of voice being used is very unpleasant, and a lot of mind-reading is being expected. I have found myself staying late, taking work home, and going in on Saturday & Sunday. The more I do, the worse it gets! Your reminder to keep the perspective on the day at hand and CLEAN THE FILTER is right on. Thanks
Stressed-out

try to always live each day as if it were my last, with joy and taking care of today, today. This way, nothing ever gets too far out of balance as each day must be balanced. Have a good week, Ruth

One of the things I do is karate. Once a week I go to class, leave feeling exhausted but stronger. Karate has enabled me to focus past the anger that can build up inside when there are so many deadlines to meet, so many customers who need served and the constant being pulled this way and that by co-workers who are in the same boat I am in due to staff shortages and the never ending demand on them. It also helps to have pets. I have 2 cats, who help me see the lighter side of life. It's difficult to remain stressed when your furry friend curls up in your lap purring contentedly while you scratch her ears. But, to me the most important area of my life is prayer. Prayer helps me to cope with the daily activities while it also helps me to focus on something other than myself. I believe if helps to get our minds off "self" because then we can see that we don't have it quite so bad and there are so many other people with greater hardships than our own. I also try to look at things in my life with a grateful heart and true blessings. Because everything that happens in my life and that I've had to endure is to make me a stronger, kinder more compassionate person. Kay

One thing I do to stay balanced is to stay up late. I figure if I give "Da Man" eight hours a day, then I should get at least that many for myself. That means I don't go to sleep until I have had at least eight hours of "me" time after work.

Balancing

I rely on my senses to keep me balanced. When I've discovered I have over extended myself, I work on regrouping and coming back into focus. I've learned over the last year and a half to do this. It's the only way I keep myself in "check" in order to work, take care of my family, and attend school. Denise from San Bernardino , CA

In relation to keeping balance in my life. What I do on a daily basis is a lot of positive self talk. I also try to keep organized. Keeping track of things in my daily planner, even my personal Dr's appt., kids appt., dental appt., activities at school, ETC. I also try to remember that if you do too much of one thing then you know you are off balance. In my mind I say a little bit of this and a little bit of that!!!! and it works for me!!! :-)
I always remember to do something special for myself on a weekly basis. We become so consumed in everything else that we forget to treat ourselves special. Thanks Tami

Now each subject/topic is important to me but sometimes I can’t handle all of them at one time, and it can get overwhelming, so when I feel out of balance I make my list, validate my emotions in regard to each feeling and then once I make my list, I then cross three of, (three from any section) then after I do that, I cross three more off and then I cross two more off, which leaves ONE and generally that one if addressed will filter to the other areas and balance comes back. I hope I made sense with what I wrote, it is a busy morning and I am taking time to answer your question.

The things that I use to balance my life with home, work, and disappointments are I never began my day without God! When I wake up, I reach for my Bible and read His Word, and then I ask him to direct my paths and give me wisdom for the day. I stay pretty much on a schedule and prioritize the things that are most important first. I do this by using my Microsoft Outlook. If things come up that I have no control over, I go with the flow. I always try to call and let people know if I’m going to be late, if I have to cancel, etc. I try very hard not to bring work home with me. I have asked my family to remind me if I do, unless it’s something that I absolutely have to do. My family is always 2^nd to work! I deal with disappointments as they come and pray over them and ask God to give me the strength to accept it, and I am still in the learning mode of not dwelling on it anymore. If we keep on living, disappointments will come, but we have the power to Choose how we allow our circumstances to affect us! Hope this helps. Bernice

I have so enjoyed your motivational writings and encouragement through the email. I'm going to be retiring from State Service on September 30, 2003, but do want you to know I faithfully kept track of all the great things that came from your emails; I have spent 32 years with the State of CA-27 with the EDD and 5 years with the California Highway Patrol. It's been a fun ride, and a fun adventure. There were lots of hills to struggle
up and sometimes fell down with a crash. But I would say the clients, (the good, the bad and the ugly) were all awesome; no matter what their attitude, helped me learn. Compassion, understanding, empathy, sometimes frustration, laughter and just felt every day was a day at Disneyland ; you never know what ride you are going to run into next. But there were some really rough times too, and I learned to meet each day as a challenge with some victories, and some yucky feelings- But in the morning I would pray that
someone would talk to me that day that I could give some help, or at least an ear to hear them vent, brag, etc. And I feel that every day the Lord did send me someone different. So thanks for the great emails, and the great seminar I got to attend in San Diego . Take care, and I hope every day will be a challenge and a victory for you.-----------------Frances Manus

You have a pool? I was thinking that in order to be truly life motivated I need to come visit! Take care, Seanna

Go to church and pray about it, read my horoscope, check my sense of humor and remind myself to be flexible Enjoy Seattle. You're just a plane ride away from sunshine. Aloha, Joy

I read a book recently called "Excuse Me, Your Life Is Waiting" by Lynne Grabhorn. What it proposes is that we essentially reap what we sow. What I learned from it is that my perspective is the essential factor in every negative situation. If I can change my perspective I can change the situation and the more I change my perspective to the positive, the more positive stuff comes my way. For me, this one thing has served to change my sense of life balance more than anything else. --Cindra—

Balance is something that is so important. However most of us do not have balance, we are so occupied with the day to day activities. You have to have a release for your life, I don't care where you are in life. You can have all the money, power, and position you want but if there is no balance you have gained nothing. I have found this out the hard way no balance you are stressed and frustrated with your life. We as a people are so caught up with trying to climb the corporate ladder that we forget about what is important to us. First you must have a relationship with God because He is the one who gives us balance. I am not talking about knowing about Him, but you must come to know Him. Then comes your family if you have one, or your girlfriend or boyfriend if you are a single person. They must become a priority after your relationship with God and finally take time for yourself. If you burn yourself out you are no good to anyone including yourself. This is how I have achieved balance in my life I came to realize that there is more to life than money and prestige. Don't misunderstand you want to live comfortably, but trying to get rich you burn the candle at both ends. Everyone loses. There are no crises only opportunities, one must learn to look at problems, or crises and we sometimes call them from God's perspective. View them as opportunities to learn something and grow from, again not saying that things don't crop up from time to time but it is how we respond to them that make them a crisis or not. This is just my perspective on things and hopefully it will help someone else out there. Michael Ohio

I balance my life by having dialogue with my thoughts. I listen and then respond with words what I need to do. Example: if i have no control over some things, my thoughts go wild---. So I talk to me, calm me down and then talk to me and the Man upstairs. I am not a religious per se, but I believe strongly in faith and the power above. I never go to sleep without saying a thank you for my blessings and asking to have the courage and strength to make sound judgments and wise decisions. All of this will bring balance into my life---however, I need to do some homework. I've got to learn how to let go of the things I can not do anything about. That takes fortitude, faith and trust---in me! Leona NJ